Opposition plays the Green card as Gormley and Ryan go missing

DÁIL SKETCH:AN OPPOSITION SOS went out again yesterday for the two missing Green Party Ministers. Another Order of Business and no sighting in the Chamber of John Gormley and Eamon Ryan.

Their absence was first noted by Eamon Gilmore.

“Invisible again,’’ sighed Fine Gael’s Bernard Durkan.

Gilmore wanted to know if they were attending the Green Party’s election manifesto launch in a nearby hotel. If they were, he argued, it would bring their disregard for the House to a new level of contempt.

“We all hold election events, but we try to arrange them so that they do not clash with key times for parliamentary business.’’

Addressing the press gallery, he said it was unfair to those journalists who were the sole representatives of their respective organs, forcing them to choose between the Dáil and the Green Party event.

“Poor media,’’ observed Independent Finian McGrath, oozing sincerity.

Gilmore remarked: “Incidentally, I wish them well in the European elections.’’ He, too, oozed sincerity.

A confused Dr James Reilly of Fine Gael wondered aloud if the Labour leader meant the journalists or the Green candidates. The private consensus was he was referring to the Greens.

Fine Gael’s Paul Kehoe noticed the red rose sported by Green Party backbencher Mary White. It was very large, the kind favoured by Labour people at election time.

“Deputy White is keeping her options open with the red rose she is wearing,’’ observed Kehoe.

Green Minister of State Trevor Sargent, a frequent attender at the Order of Business, remarked that it matched Kehoe’s red tie.

Fine Gael’s Alan Shatter suggested White’s “adornment’’ was for watering plants. “It has a bulb inside which can be squeezed to allow the liquid out.’’

Ceann Comhairle John O’Donoghue wanted to move on. “We can discuss the deputy’s gardening problems later.’’

Reilly suggested there could be “waterworks’’ in the chamber.

But nobody wept in anticipation of next month’s election results. Instead, there were fireworks when Bernard Durkan was less than happy with Tánaiste Mary Coughlan’s reply to his observations about the plight of the business sector. It was being slowly strangled. Listing various items of promised legislation, he added: “I could go on and on.’’

Coughlan said the draft of the Financial Services (Miscellaneous Provisions) Bill was near completion and would be published this year.

“I can go on and on, but I need to have a question.’’

A furious Durkan replied: “This is a serious issue and a smart alec response like that is not acceptable at all in the serious circumstances in which we now live.’’

When he went on to accuse the Tánaiste of flippancy, the Ceann Comhairle begged to disagree.

But then one parliamentarian’s flippancy is another’s verbal dexterity.